That's right guys, your favorite LoreMaster/Seeker is having a birthday! Now, to be perfectly honest, I have no idea exactly how old I am, or if this is really my chronological birthday, seeing as several years passed in the space of like two days for me.
Anyway, on this day, sixteen years ago for you lot, anywhere between eighteen and twenty-something for me, I was born. It wasn't a glamorous situation, nor was it celebrated with the giving of gifts. That didn't start happening until about a year later. It was just a woman squeezing out a seven-pounds, sixteen-ounces baby which was named Ashley Nicole (and no last name for you)
Now, I've actually decided to keep September sixteenth as my birthday on my new (totally not forged) documentation. I've made my new name to be Nicole Vix (it'll be Strider here soon, so last name no matter). Fully fleshed out, really nice. It says I'm twenty-one, so that's cool.
We aren't going to be having much of a celebration for it. Maybe some cake and steaks. Definitely steaks. I like steak.
Presents aren't that big of a concern for me, honestly, seeing as my (definitely not forged at all) inheritance left me with several million dollars. I can buy whatever I want and even if I couldn't afford it, I could always just kill whoever owns it (kiddingnotkidding)
I've been thinking about life before all of this happened, and I wish I knew what it would be like. Would I be happier? I'd definitely be younger, probably single. Definitely would not have a kid. I'd still be in school. I wouldn't have met Strider, though. If it weren't for that, then I'd want to go back. But I have my family now, and they are my life. On the last September sixteenth, I was so young... I had no idea what was coming, I had no idea that, by the time my next birthday came, I would be years older, a murderer, engaged, with a kid, any of it.
Sometimes I regret becoming a Seeker. I almost miss being a Runner, though I really wasn't at it long enough to start running. I remember the fear, and sometimes I think that's better than the joy.
Guys, I haven't been posting that often because I very little to say. My life has honestly not been anything interesting for you lot to watch. I give you occasional updates just so you know I'm alive. I may quit the blog soon, I don't know if it's worth it anymore.
I started on one blog to make sure I didn't go out quietly. I started a second because the first was taken from me. I then joined a blog because I lost the second as well. After that, I made this one, this blog that has seen so much of who I am, but nowhere near all of it.
I really see all of you as friends, but the fact that I would kill any of you with barely any hesitation worries me. It worries me more than I can say.
Today, I celebrate my birth, tomorrow, though, could celebrate my end. I hold no delusions of grandeur now. I am a weapon, and weapons break. I want, with all my heart, to grow old, to live a long and happy life, but the chances of that are small. You Runners have a damn good chance if you stop dying, if you start working together. Trust is a good thing, y'know.
I've been blathering for a while now, so I'll let you go now. Bye.
No comments:
Post a Comment